7/22/2019 Artificial Academy 2 Weeaboo
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This is a collection of character cards for the eroge Artificial Academy 2, backed up from the card database at no-info.no-ip.info. This collection represents nearly every card made for the game by the Western community, containing over 27,000 cards and over 3,000 eye and highlight textures made between the game's release on June 13, 2014 to October 1, 2016. This is being uploaded to preserve the community's effort in making so many cards over the past two years, and to prevent the loss of these characters in case the database goes down again.
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Artificial Academy 2 HF Patch v2.2.0.0.exe
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Posted by3 years ago
Archived
This is my recollection of a series of encounters I had with two weeaboos during my last year of highschool, back in 2013/2014. Due to the rapid escalation of the whole situation, and the severety of the conequences thereof, I have not been able to provide you with a report any sooner than now. For the sake of brevity I will try to stick to the facts and not digress if at all possible.
Be Dax, best bro of mine, buff, likes sports, watches an anime now and again, but casually.
Feel free to be me, drinkerofmilk, decent student, in Jap class, but definitely not a weeaboo. I am founder of our school's anime club, but I do my best to keep it presentable.
Be sure to be Abe, our teacher for Jap class, swell guy, a bit too quiet at times. He's not Japanese by the way, his full name is Abraham Perkins.
Don't be Hime, weeaboo, my somewhat love interest at the time. Perfect 10 but fucked up inside.
Most definitely don't be Japham, a sweaty, surly, major weeaboo ham with no manners. Will not stop talking about One Piece or Attack on Titan or whatever filth she is watching at the time.
Start of the semester. Me and my buddy Dax are pretty riled up for Jap class, we have a small anime club going for which we hope to find some new, relatively normal, members. We pride ourselves in being a down to earth, chill place without too much drama or weeaboo scum. I founded the club last year, and we have about five dedicated members, including me and Dax. One is borderline weeb, a fat neckbeard called David who I may need to introduce later on in the Saga. But David is pretty ok.
Anyway, class starts, and as Japanese is essentially an extracuriccular course at our school we are with a group of no more than ten students. We start of with introductions, and when my turn comes up I briefly introduce the club and explain our philosphy etcetera. Hardly am I able to finish before I am impertinently interrupted by a huge girl sitting next to me, Japham.
'OHIO GOMENOSAN', she slurs in the most southern accent possible 'WATASHI WA JAPHAM AND I REALLY LIKE SHOWS LIKE NARUTO AND ATTACK ON TITAN AND GOGO MEWMEW NO ATENAI'. I'm essentially sitting dumbstruck by the weeaboo regurgitation next to me while she goes on about wanting to move to Japan to further her career as a mangaka.
After about three subtle hints from Abe, Japham reluctantly passes her turn to the girl sitting beside her, Hime, a blonde, possibly one year my minor, with the brightest blue eyes I have ever seen. Her introduction is a bit more personal, she explains about how she transferred here with her best friend Japham after Japham's grades had dropped below their former school's acceptancy threshold (she's oblivious to the visible scowl this elicits from Japham). She rounds off her soliloquy by summing up her favourite anime, mostly Fruits Baskets and Fruits Baskets spin-offs.
After class I go up to Hime to invite her to anime club. Update birthdate on microsoft account. However, I subtly ask her not to bring Japham. . .
Tuesday, anime club, she brought Japham. Girl can't stop talking about Attack on Titan. Sadly David also wants to see the show, and ofcourse she manages to badger Hime into voting for it, so essentially we're watching bishies blubbering about goliaths for the next two months or so. I'm about to break down at the thought, but luckily I manage to get a second run of Technolxyze through the ballot. I may even be able to enlighten the waps with some superior Sino-Tibetan delineations.
I'm not a weeaboo. I own maybe 15 figurines tops, I have three posters in my room, only of my absolute favourite shows. I have them framed tastefully, like works of art, and it's none of that loli bullshit you see all over Sankaku. I own one dakimakura that I never use.
Anyway, after what seems to be an eternity of crying shotas, Hime comes up to me and asks me to come over to her place on saturday night to do homework. I'm completely stoked. What with her toned body, probably C, even D cup, long blonde hair. She's really not the kind of girl you'd expect to be a weeaboo.
Saturday night. Turns out Japham's there too. I want to make a runner but Hime is wearing PJ's and they really accentuate her silhouette. The dick is mightier than the sword.
Japham wants to watch Nausicaa or some other childish shit like that. I suggest that End of Evangelion might be a better option, as it touches the more mature and philosophical concepts that we may be expected to posess in highschool.
'FURAZU NO SEIISHUN NO HANABI KASHIRA DESU YO NAUSICAA KOKORO!!!' Japham screams furiously, but astonishingly Hime chooses my side and we commence watching Anno's mangum opus. Hime throws Japham a box of pocky to quiet her down, which the landwhale manages to stuff into her maw in ONE FUCKING LOT.
By the time Shinji jerks it to Asuka our food supplies have already run out and Japham's complaints about her bloodsugar are steadily growing more frequent. When Lilith appears (my favourite scene btw) Japham's phone starts ringing.
'MOSHI MOSHI?!', Japham yells. She'd have a habit of picking up the phone with that phrase at random situations, even when it wasn't ringing. This time, however, it was. Where to find skooma in skyrim.
'That's my mom, need to go', she says bluntly after a short conversation.
Artificial Academy 2 Weeaboo Song
It was technically my virginity I lost that night, albeit with a large emphasis on the technical part. Anyway, we fucked, Hime sucked my dick, and I climaxed splendidly to the sound of her softly whimpered Japanese terms of endearment (my own suggestion, I'll reluctantly admit).
Cut to monday morning, waiting for Jap class to begin. Hime isn't there. It's just Japham, whining and whinig about the last trashy seinen nonsense she's watched. Dax is next to me, trying hardest to ignore her. Enter Abe and class begins.
She can't stop commenting, it's like she's compensating for Hime's abscence. She replies to every question Abe asks (unprompted, the rest of us raise our hands in vain) with some segue into Luffy fighting Coco or whatever his name was. This goes on long after Abe wisely decides to stop asking the class questions, with Japhame nudging her way into his lecture each time he pauses for a breath, with nonsense about the parallels between Edo-period literature and K-On.
And I can't take it anymore.
'Ehm, gomenosai senpai,' I ask Abe in perfect Japanese. 'But couldn't you get this debu inu to urusai for just one fucking minute?.' Abe looks at me with a twinkle in his eye and proceeds to glorously put Japham in her place with some well aimed threats of detention.
Class goes on uneventfully for about a quarter hour or so while Abe gives a presentation on the life and works of the great Kunikida Doppo, which most likely goes entirely over Japham's head. Life is good for a short while. I can almost feel Dax relaxing next to me.
Suddenly, however, I am abrupltly awoken from my intellectual explorations by a deafening 'URUSAI TABIDACHI HONTO SABUSABU NO SEISHIN TABESHI WOOOOOOO JAMETEOO!!!' from right behind me, immediately followed by an searing pain emanating from my right shin. It's Japham, who has, after slowly building up pressure like a Fubu simmering in an Onsen, violently erupted and stabbed her vermiljon kuretake-pen deep into my left calf. The utensil has pierced my skin and wedged it's way between my muscle tissue, bearing a tiny sliver of bleach-white bone.
I am vaguely aware of Dax ramming Japham into a bloody pulp as I slowly but decidedly slip into unconsciousness. . .
End of part 1.
Stand by for Part 2, when Hime returns and things start to get a little bit crazy.
edited heavily for formatting
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